From Bitter to Better
If I’m completely honest, I have had my share of times when negativity got the best of me. The type of bitterness that penetrated my daily peace. There was a distinction between moments when I knew I was upset and other times when I had to “get through it” to realize how painful my mindset had affected me. Neither situation is better than the other. Occasionally bitterness just resides inside a person with little chance of resolving itself on its own. Common sense tells us that being bitter doesn’t solve anything, and yet we still go down that road.
While I eventually understand the error of my ways, seeing someone else experiencing bitterness is a clearer way of defining their resentment. Whether it is their behavior or the words they profess, the torment is well-defined. It may be true that they are so far into their resentment that they don’t claim it for what it’s worth. For some, bitterness is normal, and the chip on their shoulder is real. Observable expressions of bitterness in some people are used to soften the sting out of the equation. It is likely an easier process to shake off bitterness when it happens to someone else.
I’ve witnessed people who are experiencing bitterness that “better” was always out of reach. In fact, one of my friends was so entrenched in how the local church had hurt him that he referred to his situation as “retreating to the desert.” Try as I may, he was not interested in seeing his situation any differently. He failed to see God in the mix of his desire to worship God in a contemporary worship experience. He had been a drummer in a contemporary worship band and strongly believed that God had forsaken him. In its extreme form, bitterness may take weeks, months, or years to make it to a better place.
So how does someone transform bitter into better? I suppose the easy answer is understanding that bitterness has no value. Yet the world is full of bitterness. If it is true that we are what we eat, then life can become one big ball of bitter. I also believe that finding some “better” gives a fresh perspective on bitter. Moving towards a commitment to focus on better can be a great start towards re-framing life.